i had a dream

have you ever had a dream that was so real — not in the bad sense, that's another blog. but a dream that is so real that is is the essence of feeling or emotion?

usually sexual dreams are like that. sexual in the sense that the dream encounter is like eating concentrated frozen lemonade... you finally are with that person who fulfills your need/desire for this kind of contact. be it raw sex or emotional cuddles. you melt into the situation with your heart and soul.

but there are other dreams that fulfill other emotions...

some people go to hawaii and come back and say, "yeah, it was nice." some people when they leave feel like a molar is being pulled, a part of them is being severed.

i had a dream last night (not sexual sorry) that i was back in maui. i was with my friend that lives there. i was in a bungalow. dark. window shutters drawn. i was skeptical that it was maui but something inside said 'yes danno, it is maui!' my friend was outside calling me.

i opened the door and stepped out onto a covered lanai, shielded from the hot tropical sun. just a few feet away was an opening in a heavily vegetative area. i stepped into the bright sunlight and was terrified that if i looked up i wouldn't see the massive hulk of the ancient caldera Haleakalā, or see the Iao Valley Needle.


the sun was bright and hot, and as i looked up i saw no ancient eroded basalt lava cones. but i knew in my  heart that it was hawaii. my friend michael was at the edge of the clearing telling me so.  


the desire to be back in hawaii was so STRONG. i reached for my camera, i zoomed in on a boulder, looking for a sign that it was the black rugged ancient basalt strewn from the bowels of the earth 5 million  years ago.

i zoomed into the ever so faint grey smear of a dreary drizzle dawn oozing thru the skylight over my bed. i zoomed into wednesday, april 11, in the year 2012 of our lord jesus christ... well, i don't know if he's my lord. not the jesus that the politicians and the evangelists and the catholic church have conjured up to grab power and spew intolerance like molten magma. but that's another blog.

the gloom settled down over me... alas, i was wrenched away from my paradise again, back to new york state and the lake effect gloom that rises up from ontario like smoke from sauron's mordor to cover the mohawk valley.

a stirring at my side, a tiny yawn, and my toy yorkshire terriers huddled against my shins rose for a new day. darling creatures, they live in the now more than i ever can attain. but you can't attain something that is always and forever already a part of you.

but that's another blog.